Three Secrets to Positive Aging (No, Two of Them Are NOT Diet and
Exercise!)
The exciting field of brain science, and research
like the Harvard Study of Adult Development, reinforce that you no
longer have to look forward to your mother's (or father's) old age. So
much of the research is pointing toward what we life coaches have
instinctively known ? it is the strength of your personal foundation and
development of certain capabilities that keep you young and vital, and
determine your happiness as you age.
If you're lucky, you're positively going to age, but are you going to
age positively?
Here are three factors I believe are crucial to positive aging:
1. The Flex Factor. The Flex Factor is all about resiliency,
flexibility and adaptability. How well do you bounce back when life
throws you a curve ball? Do you usually go with the flow or dig your
heels in when things don't happen the way you expect them to? Can you
easily adapt to a change of plans or an unplanned situation?
I always think of Christopher Reeve when I think of the Flex Factor.
While by his own account he wanted to die when he was first paralyzed,
when he made the decision to live, he went on to make lemonade out of a
great big batch of bitter lemons. He spent every day of the rest of his
life working towards finding a cure for spinal cord injuries. He never
lost hope that he would some day walk again. And, he left a legacy of
hope for others. So whether you choose change, or it smacks you right
between the eyes, seize the opportunity to reinvent yourself ? not a
different you, but a deeper, more authentic you, and make the most
delicious lemonade possible out of the lemons that come your way.
2. The Grace Factor. The Grace Factor is about lightening up,
and has three important components: maintaining your sense of humor,
developing an attitude of gratitude, and expanding your ability to
forgive. First, maintaining your sense of humor means being able to
laugh at yourself and the indignities that often come with old age.
It's the fastest way to lighten up when you're feeling down, and it can
quickly shift your perspective and your experience. And, if you don't
have a sense of humor, get one.
Second, when you develop an attitude of gratitude, you're able to deeply
and profoundly appreciate all that you have. Instead of focusing on
what you don't have, what was, and/or what will never be again, you grow
a grateful (and positive!) attitude. Finally, expanding the ability to
forgive is the one that many of us find the most difficult. Don't
ignore this one! Instead, be willing to let go of the anger, resentment
and desire for revenge against those who have harmed you in some way.
There is that wonderful expression that says by not forgiving, you are
drinking a glass of poison and hoping the other person will die.
Honestly, it's not about condoning or even forgetting what happened.
It's about freeing yourself from the power that the person who harmed
you still holds over you. It's not about them. It's all about you ?
and your well-being. And, while you're at it, don't forget to forgive
yourself for all those things you deem unforgivable.
3. The Zest Factor. The Zest Factor is embracing the snap,
crackle and pop of life. It's having the capacity to play and to love,
a desire to connect with others, the ability to gain nourishment from
your past accomplishments, but not dwell there. It's being curious and
willing to learn from other generations. It's engaging in the world and
living with anticipation, excitement and hope for what each new day will
bring. Without it, life loses its luster.
Make a commitment to develop these factors in yourself, and you'll build
a solid foundation for the rest of your life. And, who knows? You may
even become the poster child for positive aging!
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Certified Retirement
Coach Lin Schreiber, author of the popular The ABC's of Revolutionizing
Retirement, helps self-reliant women reinvent themselves in the next
stage of life, formerly known as "retirement." To claim your copy of her
free popular Revolutionize Retirement Starter Kit, visit her site at
http://www.RevolutionizeRetirement.com.
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